i'm going through changes

When I started this blog four years ago, I had just finished my Associate's degree, started full-time with the local school system and really wanted to get my teaching degree and be a full-time teacher. Now I have finished my Bachelor's degree, I'm still an in-school suspension coordinator, but I no longer care to be a teacher.

I've looked long and hard about who I want to be as a person, and the school system just doesn't impress me at all. There is a lazy self-importance to most people that work in a school that shows in everything they do. Not only do I feel completely unwanted, I really feel like my job is pointless. Even if I had the ability to make a difference with the kids, I don't have the support of the school. The pay is completely inadequate too.

I guess if I work at it hard enough and long enough, I'll get my comeuppance, but it's been a long time coming.

countdown to the BLET

I started jogging last week and I can already notice a difference. I have about 23 weeks before BLET will start and I think I'll be in condition that will exceed thier expectations. When I go back to work, I'm going to re-start weight watchers. With diet and exercise, I should reach several goals all at once.

My money situation is dire. My job sucks ass in the pay department and it won't get better anytime this year, which means several of my goal won't get met. This pisses me off. I've busted my ass to better myself and I want some payoff, but it never comes. Until I get some manner of decent break, I'm just spinning my wheels.

nightmare

I dreamed last night that my degree got messed up and I needed more classes to fix it. Then I woke up. Sadly, with the way things worked out, it would be much more than an inconvenience. I would honestly not mind taking a few more criminal justice classes. Besides, the only job prospect I have will not become available to me until next June. Oh well, nothing can be done about it now except to do it and get it over with.

I almost thought about still trying to get a job with the school system and just not doing the licensure classes. I'd lose the job at the end of the school year, but who cares now?

disillusion

I no longer care to be in education. Too little pay, too little reward, and too much bullshit. Working in education is a losing battle, hands down. The people are mostly full of themselves and flock into little gossip groups. We encourage the kids not to be like that. I'm just sick of it all and I don't even want to go back.

Sadly, it's not the kids that have me fed up. The "adults" mostly make me sick. There are a few exceptions, and there are some I'll not soon forget.

My life is taking me in a whole new direction, and I am excited.

travelling the road to wellness

Since I'll most likely start BLET's in January, I've started getting into shape now so I don't risk injury. Feels like a death march. I've always gone for fitness that appeals to me: weightlifting. That will not help me run a mile. No, I have to take a boot camp-like approach to my fitness goals, namely jogging and calisthenics. In 6 months, I should be in awesome shape. By this time next year, not only should I be in the greatest shape of my life, I should be in the career I plan to retire from. Not exactly what I was hoping for, but that's where I am right now.