I want to run...

No, not exercise. I want into politics. I have a few political ideas I'd like to promote. I think I have a good working theory about the government and its major short comings. I have even began fostering a platform. I might make a separate blog for this, or I just might do a website. Why not?

free lunch......

I have instances every day where I see first hand the failings of our system. I see people being rewarded for doing poorly. I remember field day as a kid. Some won, many lost, everyone got a ribbon. The blue first place was an awesome thing to have pinned to your shirt. The red ribbon of second was also great, as was third. Then there was "honorable mention". I thought honorable mention meant "loser". I had a few of each, honorable mention was the most common. We can't all be winners. Then one year we didn't do ribbons at all and nobody tried. There must be rewards for exceptional ability and effort. Likewise there should be nothing for those who don't try to excel.

This brings me to welfare and other social programs. I don't care for them. Welfare and these social aid programs were meant to be used as a way to get people on thier feet, to provide a home to raise thier children and make sure they get what they need to get off on the right foot, so the next generation gets out of the projects. It didn't quite happen that way.
I believe the govenment made a major faux pas by thinking the answer to helping these people was to give them handouts. If a person gets something without earning it, they tend to take it for granted. Eventually they become complacent and lazy. Then they expect the handout. The icing on the cake is when they use all of thier free time getting into some kind of trouble.
In nature, an organism that lives in a system that either does not positively contribute or is detrimental in nature is called a parasite. A parasite is never seen as a good thing.

I know very intellegent people design goverment programs. If this welfare program is such a failure, why does it continue to exist? I have several theories, some mild, some extreme.

Commerce excuse:
We continue to give social benefits to the downtrodden to augment the flow of money. They get money, they consume goods, people have jobs to supply them, and the money flows.

I know for a fact if had some of my own tax money back I would spend it on me. i like stuff and I would buy more. I think everyone would.

Grand Conspiracy theory:
We give welfare so that those demographics become lazy and complacent, it keeps who WE want in change and propetuates OUR superiority.

I could almost buy this one.

Cynics view:
Such a large percentage of the population recieves some sort of social aid that any politician using welfare reform/repeal as a part of thier campaign would be committing career suicide. And most of our legislators are pandering, spineless creeps that are more interested in passing non-laws than trying to make a difference in our country.

BINGO!

I am an optimist at heart. I always hope for the best and try to see the good, but I also prepare for the worst and aknowledge that there is always a downside.

I say let those who cannot help themselves be helped. Those who will not help themselves must be allowed to reap what they sow. They will either find a way to make it, or drown in thier own ocean of apathy and self pity. No honorable mention in the form of a welfare check.

Must make money

To help myself with my money situation AND my overflow of junk, I have decided to have the mother of all yard sales. It will happen in a few weeks and I will be getting rid of everything. That which is not sold will be tossed out.

I find myself drooling over furniture ads. I envision how cool it would be to have those crisp, clean pieces of furniture in my freshly painted and carpeted house. I am now old.

I'm becoming a big fan of making my home a den of creature comforts. This somewhat of a contratiction of my need to live frugally, but I feel a happy medium can be met. I just need to prioritize.

Robyn has been feeling horrible as of late. Dizzy, headaches, nausea, chest pains, and shortness of breath. She felt so bad on Sunday when she dropped by I wouldn't let her leave. She and I both think her blood pressure may be too high. I've been telling her only water, fruits and veggies until she goes to the doctor. It's making her feel better. I think she also likes the fact I'm so concerned over her health. I'm not too sure her boyfriend is showing as much concern. I have no clue as to what's going on there, nor do I really want to. She'll tell soon enough if she's ready. I love her to death, but she will not hold back if she has something to bitch about. Well, she will if she's REALLY mad, even that will pass.

I'm going to do everything I feel my car needs while I still have the cash to do it. I think all that is left is a vacuum leak near the brake booster. I may have to replace the whole thing, but if it works, it will be well worth it. Driving a car that won't idle on its own is a pain. As much as I like my little accord, it makes me hate it to fight it in stop & go traffic. If I do that, it has fresh tires, so I should be good for awhile.

I did a "soft start" to eating healthy today. I had a banana and an apple for breakfast. I might have some chili for dinner. It's cheap, filling & low carb. I like Atkins. I love that diet. It's like getting tricked into weight loss. The only real problem is alot of it you have to plan most of your meals and it requires alot of preparation if you are on the move quite a bit. I didn't want to stop the diet, but new job, and a tumultutous 10 months has made it difficult to just get by, let alone eat healthy.
Any diet that let's you eat bacon, cheese, and sausage and you still lose weight. That's ok with me!

There are a few downsides to atkins.
1. Eating alot of meat is pricey.
2. You HAVE to take vitamins. You need extra potassium too.
3. You must drink half of you body weight in ounces of water everyday.
4. It turns your poop into large, unforgiving, unyeilding, bricks o' pain. I swear I chipped the toilet bowl once.

Other than than the fact I felt like I had pooped a microwave when I didn't get enough water, I felt better than I had pretty much most of my life. I had energy, my temper was under control, I wasn't depressed. It was all good and I really want that back. This time, I will exercise too.

Dear Diary........

On Sunday, Paul & Robyn helped me move my giant aquarium. Thanks. I have a LONG way to go before the house is finished. But she is getting there.

Summer approaches quickly. Soon the money for school will stop coming. This will make my monthly bills difficult. I need supplemental money. My approximate bill breakdown look something like this:

Rent - $259
Lights - $120 *
Water - $50*
Phone - $40
Cell Phone - $65
Internet - $45
Food - $God only knows
Gas -$35
Car Gas - $200 - I still deliver pizza*
Home Insurance - $55*
Car Ins - $95*

*These items are either not a monthly occurence, or I can alter them .

I come up to $964 a month before I ever even eat. The tips from delivering pizza takes care of the gas. That puts me at $764 before food.

Robyn wants me to watch her kids over the summer. She willing to pay $120 a week + food. That will put me in at 480/mo. + my domino's check = about $ 700. Tips would have to be below average for me to not clear all my bills and have about 150-200 a month left over, but this is way less than I'd like to be working with. However, babysitting two well behaved kids affords me other opportunities. I would be free to make costumes all summer. If I could turn just $50 a week profit, which is a very reasonable goal, I could easily make it all happen very easily. Next year, I'm opting for year-round pay.

This will only work if nothing major (bad) happens.

I have found breaking my goals up into bite-sized pieces helps get them done. Here is the current list.

1. Move back into home.....done.

2. Get things organized, one room at a time.......getting there. kitchen is done, Living room is so close it is a non-issue, computer room is good. The back porch and spare bedrooms are both bad, but they will get there, I just have to pack away or throw away for the bedroom. The back porch will be last.

Even though it is difficult to let go of stuff when you are a packrat, there is a sense of releif when it is gone and you have beautiful clear spaces left. I should have a washer/dryer soon. That will make my life easier.

Next will be to get back to my education. It will all come to pass. I WILL take classes at ACC this fall to bridge myself into an education program at a 4 year college. I want to be ready to be a full time student some where by next fall, I will break the land speed record getting my BA and then I can really make some progress in my life.

Anyone can have goals, not everyone has the drive to achieve them.

sometimes........

I wrote a post for two hours today. I felt very good about it. I was going for clean-flowing, cohiesive content, and I felt I had really nailed it. My computer froze I'm distraught.

So no good content for you today. I'll try again tomorrow. Very tired, busy day, blah blah blah......