New Wilson's Dictonary

I found some funnies I'm going to add a few of my own.




Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.

Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

Glibido: All talk and no action.

Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

Deja Poo: the act of cutting wind in you own car, getting out, coming back and the gassy smell is still there.

Dr Pibb: Robyn's favorite drink, at least she seems to order it alot at late night dive throughs when she's really tired.

Hypochristians: the "holier than thou" type that judges and criticizes you, but they are not exactly angels themselves.

Prostitots: underage girls that dress like whores.

Dubcaps: The trashy-ass hubcaps designed to look like trashy-ass rims.

Thug Lite: when privleged white kids act like they're from the ghetto.

Feel free to come up with your own.