half-day maddness

The new incliment weather protocol is being used for the school system. We've had two delays and zero ice. I will argue that even though it seems almost knee-jerkish, I'd far prefer err on the side of caution when childrens lives are risked. There is a downside. It seems as though getting to school at 10 vs 8 has an adverse effect on thier behavior. I guess they are lucid enough to be able to buck conformity by 10 instead of getting into the motions while still groggy.

Either way, a shortened day makes for some misery for most of the school and even I'm not immune.

Still haven't won the lottery yet, no end to poverty in sight. Days like today make me think I would quit if I struck it rich. I thought about it, all the kids acting like "buy me something", the school saying, "donation", and parents wanting to sue. There would be people hounding me for money constantly. I'd try to keep it sublte, but I'd eventually give in and buy a luxury item or two and the jig would be up.

I guess that's why they call them "life changing events". You can't do the same things you did before. The rules all changed or they no longer apply to you.

soft job

Paul called Saturday morning and asked if I could help him finish his move. There was no problem there. I was glad to have an excuse to get out of the house. He was moving to cut expenses and looks like he did a good job. It was a funny few loads. Paul is constantly aggrivated by his mom. He agreed to do what she asked and she kept on hounding him. They have a very fragile relationship that is hilarious to witness in action.

He had quite a bit of large items that had to squeeze through small spots. It happened within an hour or so. He place has many interesting features:

1. Upstairs loft.
2. Flooring by Salvitore Dahli
3. Delicious pecans everywhere (seasonal item)
4. Very odd non English speaking Kahzistani refugees as neighbors.

I think Paul may have instigated a Jihaad against himself by trying to shake the hand of the female elder. He may have only married her, thier customs are so strange and beautiful. I guess I'll know next visit what the outcome was.

GEEK-FEST!

What a weekeknd! Quite a few interesting things happened. Friday night I went to the Mebane X-mas parade. I'm not a big fan of freezing my ass off to watch kids stomp down the road and freeze thier asses off, but Robyn wanted to go and I accepted. It was very good. To my shock the opening maching band was the A&T Aggies! They were damn impressive too! It was an interesting surprise, to say the least and I had quite abit of hypothermic fun. The Graham Middle step team performed also. They were really dragging by the time they got to me. I pulled off my hood and said "GO FALCONS!" They turned and saw me waiving and they picked it up a notch. I didn't realize until the walk back that my bad knee had thoroughly stiffened from the cold and it was a painful hike.

At Best Buy Saturday, I found out that my co-worker in the warehouse was going to be absent. Not good. I had quite a bit of work to do but it was ok. If I stay busy, the night moves quicker.

During a shopping cart run in the parking lot, a little Ford Ranger similair to mine came roaring up beside me and parked. Those most familiar with Ranger know they don't usually "roar". I asked him and he quickly explained that it was converted to a 5.0 Mustang GT engine and tranny. I've been wanting to do this for some time and did quite a bit of reading on the topic. He told me that it was way easier than than most internet folk led on. He showed me the engine and explained everything I needed to do to make it happen and it is sort of simple, but I couldn't do it myself. I see a new idea for my truck forming even now......

Sunday was spent at Debbie,s house for her X-mas party. They have a really cute home and the food was great! She always did know how to throw a party. We're all older adults now, nothing crazy, pretty much family and co-workers. Almost every one there was a teacher, so the topics were things I could deal with. Then I was shown Jason's (Debbie's hubby) RPG collection. He and a co-worker/ gaming buddy talked with me about gaming. I was invited to thier game, but I don't think he realized I live 1.5 hours away. I'd be up for a one-shot, but I can't drive 3 hours round trip to game anymore. Wished they lived closer though....

Car-geekery, band-geekery, teacher-geekery, and game geekery, this was a wonderful weekend indeed!

more on creativity

I failed to mention my creative phase. I want to write a book. I've wanted to write a book since high school and had a basic idea of what I wanted to do, but I've never come to realize it. I'm thinking of writing some short stories first. Just to get my juices flowing. I might post them here, I just don't know yet. When I feel I'm up to task, I'll start a novel.

I was always complimented for my writing in school. I was told by several teacher I was gifted in the area and I should do something with it. I think I'm getting close to the time where I will try to use my talents to good use. If I'm lucky. I could actually profit from the venture.

I think I'll try my hand at as many genres as possible untill I find which best suits my style.

A creative phase

I spent pretty much the whole day Sunday at home cleaning up. I got a decent ammount of progress too. I love a clean house. I hate housework though. There were so many loads of laundry done I lost track and I ran out of hangers to put them on. I'd have like to have accomplished more, but I was rather satisfied with what I had finished.

This weekend was too cold & rainy for any truck nonsense. I'll buy the parts I need on Thursday to get get it finished mechanically. I'll have to get someone to work on the non-functioning brake lights. I bought a starter for my long-defunct Crown Vic. I really like those cars. I might be open to buying another one in the future to have as a decent car. I'm really aggrivated with my Honda. I'm mostly to blame. It runs about as good as can be expected.

Work has been work. Best Buy is a lousy retail job. I like my co-workers, management is pretty inept. Almost every problem in the store stems from mismanagement. I think I might be a part of the problem. I bellyache so much about the place that it must honestly lower morale in my department. Pessimism is highly contaigeous and I'm a carrier. School is easy and pretty decent. Most all the staff has warmed up to me. I feel pretty good about being here and I go with the flow. I wish the job paid more, but you can't have everything, right?

It's now Tuesday. My house still looks pretty decent. I need to vacuum and mop, but it just does wonder to your ego when the house is straight, not playing leapfrog over piles of trash and dirty clothes. I like to walk in and see nice, clean, inviting home, not an embarassing trash heap.

long time, no post

My life has been somewhat busy. I also have not had anything good to write about. Everything is in limbo at the moment. My truck still needs parts to be done, Best Buy is still the cancer of retail, my house is still messy, amd I don't know if I can afford to attend school yet.

I think I want to go to law school after my BA. There is a science teacher here still trying to pass the bar and I told him we should get a firm together after I finish. We can call it Jones & Wilson attorneys at law. He really liked the name. I realize that crime & such will only get worse. Why not be a parasitic ambulance-chaser? You can't change the world, but you can profit from its mistakes.

Last week I had a massive jump in readers. My views are up by 33%. This is great news and we appreciate you, the faithful readers for your continued support.

I think I'm going to try to add more stories to my posts. It appears to be a very popular segment.

Anyway, movie review time. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
Being a fan of the books, I was eager to see this movie. I was sorely let down by #3. HP4 was far better. My only disappointment is the fact that it is not designed as a stand alone movie. You have to be knowledgeable of the Harry Potter series to fully enjoy and understand it. But it's not too shabby. The wooden "kid acting" is not there. The delivery and timing are great, the movie seems "alive". It is action-packed, yet it has emotion as well. I very much enjoyed it. If they go in this trend, I'd love to see them all made into movies.

I'm ready for the holidays. It would be made perfect if I didn't have to work at a part time job. Just sit at home and chill, listening to Christmas carrols and sipping chai latte's. My sister is getting grown. I'm going to encourage a not-so agrandized holiday season celebration. Warm get togethers, not some pointless pagan holiday extraviganza where the sacrifice is you cash flow for the next three months. It's really all quite silly.

Speaking of holiday spending, I must work Black Friday at BB from 6 til closing. I'm personally disgusted by all the commercialism. "Show the one's you love how much you care this holiday season. Come put your ass in hock till 2013. Merry effin X-mas.

fear is the mind-killer

For the first time, I'm starting to doubt some of the "good" choices I've made. I work right at 60 hours a week and make just enough to barely get by. I'm so sick of being broke all the time. It seems as though any treat I give myself is too expensive and causes a sacrifice somewhere else. My car is garbage. The truck I've been doting over is garbage. I'm sick of it all. Yesterday I wanted to watch tv....no cable. My computer is a borrowed one. Springs are starting to poke out of my mattress.

I realize that at some point my life seems to revolve around doing without and finding way to work more and make do with nothing.

If you can't tell, I'm frustrated. I know my plan would take a few years to come to any positive results, but I figured working my self half to death and not having much of any kind of luxuries would yeild some measure of financial comfort. But no, I struggle every month, even when I don't "splurge". I might have to give up this career path. I can't exist off what I'm being paid. I'm just sick of going through life feeling like I'm spinning my wheels in the mud.

To put it bluntly, something's going to have to give, because this s**t ain't working anymore.

a hard fought victory

After a few months of planning and only a few hours of tinkering, my truck now runs. I don't like the way the tranny shifts rough, and there are no tail lights, but it is mechanically driveable. The problem was a very simple fix, but it took alot of experimenting to repair it. Next, I'll fix all the minor issues and make it road-ready. After I'm 100% sure it's mechanically sound, I'll start the "creature comfort" part of repairing it.

I feel like crap today. I'm half sick.

more talk about me.

When I created TSOTS, wanted to use it for a dumping ground of all my thoughts, an online therapy session of sorts. It seems to be more of a dear diary thing. Not that it bad, but it does make for some interest moments.

"Hey Paul what's up?"

"Not much, how are you?"

"Not too much, man Besy Buy made me mad. I just might quit."

"Yeah, I read you blog....."

That happened, and it was a surreal moment. I'm no stranger to technology, but using the internet as a medium to project my thoughts and such and actually have a person keeping up with it was a very odd feeling. I think I'm going to do more open ended posts that invite discussion. Opinions and such.

On the homefront, I saw a car at a local dealer lot that I really want. It's a red Suzuki Sidekick. I like the 4 door version very much, and the 4-banger engine makes it cheap to drive. That would be all right. I'll check on it, but I seriously doubt I can get it.

It seems as though they want to give me hours at BB again, I could work all day if I wanted to on Sunday, but that won't happen. I'll probaly offer up myself a bit more to "catch up" and get ahead. Techinically, I work three jobs. A 60 hour work week is rough at best.

When you get to the point that yo work 6 and 7 days a week, it feels like you never stop. There is no "me" time and that, for me, is a crucial thing. You get tired, burned out, and you stop living and start exisiting. All your 'free time goes to housekeeping and bill paying.

I've been working as I do and trying to get back to school because I want the free time.

update...sortof.....

I'm writing to say there was nothing to write about. Haloween sucked and it sucked so bad that not only am I not going to write about what happened, but I may never observe the holiday again.

There was a delay in getting my afterschool pay, so it didn't come on the current check. I was told it should come to us this week.

My car is dying a slow, horrible death. I might try one last time to ge it fixed right, but then I might just try to hold on to it until I can just buck up and get a better car. My truck is as dysfunctional as ever. I'll make a serious effort on that soon.

I've gotten to a point in my current gaming group that I really like playing again. My sorcerer has gotten to a level where he has come unto his own. This has been the most challenging for me to play to date. I like RPG's. It might make me a geek, but it's having a mini vacation from reality for a few hours. In a make-belive land far away, I'm making a difference and having a Hella good time too.

I've been too broke to have done anything else recently.

A life less magical

Due to circumstances I won't write about, I didn't make it to the big Halloween observance at Chapel Hill Monday night. I think it is time for me to give up on the holiday. So, unless I have a major change of heart, there will be no more costume making, candy raids, haunted house visiting, or Halloween parties. It seemed like I was so close, and then I had the world yanked out from under me. I can't deal with the inevitable let down so I refuse to put effort into it anymore.

Sometimes I wonder how people can go year after year, trying to live up these holiday expectations and always being let down, and yet they still go into the next one, just as bright eyed and eager. It's almost masochistic.

I'm a geek. I'm 31 and I still play D&D. I like it. After you own all the books, it is actually a cheap hobby. It is the smallest group I've ever been in and the the most successful.

I just like RPG's. I feel like it's a mini-vacation from reality. I can be someone important, some who makes a difference, if for only a few hours a week. I've been a Jedi Knight, fighting the Empire, a larger-than-life half orc warrior try to come to terms with the world where he is an outcast everywhere except with his adventuring company, a smaller than life sorcerer who's not exactly where he wanted to be in life, but trying to make himself worthy despite the fact if he were any smaller or weaker he'd be crippled.

I like realistic characters, people who struggle. Klegg could crush anything that came his way, yet he was little more than a big kid and really only wanted to be accepted. Klegg never fought for riches or glory, he mainly only wanted to protect the people who cared for him.

Daxt, the jedi was pretty much unstoppable in combat too, he found himself loathing to draw his twin lightsabers, he had been a soldier in a previous life, he saw the force as a tool to help him survive and become a better killer. He learned to love peace and finally desired to heal rather than hack.

Draco, my current character, is a small human sorcerer. he's downright sickly, but he has all sorts of magical prowess

I often play them the way they fight. Klegg was the run in full force and give everything he has type. No subtlety. Daxt was very reserved using his combat skills, so he never really "put everything on the table", he always held back a little. Draco try to keep his hands out of combat. He's knows he'll die.

Personal life updates......quips galore

I decided to confront the manager of the warehouse at Best Buy about what was going on and how I felt about how I was spoken to by her assisitant. She was surprised to hear how he treated me. She found out everyone in our department had a problem with him ranging from the way he treated people to not doing his job properly. I told her that when th GM of the store came back on Monday, I was going to tell him what was going on. If this is the one person that makes an entire store culture not function the way it's supposed to, then he's the one that needs to explore other options, not me.

It started like this:

Last Friday, I discovered I was scheduled to work a Saturday that I had already made other plans. I was told to talk to the warehouse manager. She was out until Sunday. Come Sunday, she told me only the GM can approve people swapping shifts due to them not getting covered. Come to find out he was on vacation, but a person already wanted to trade with me and we were both turned down. I was told by the assistant in the warehouse "If you can't work your schedule as posted, maybe you need to make other arrangements". I almost quit, but I decided to talk to the manager of my dept, she was nice enough to explain the situation and told me they really needed me because the other person that was to work Saturday quit. So I showed up, and it was a very good experience. Everyone asked me what was up when we were changing shifts since it seemed that a few feathers had been ruffled and my name was brought up.

I explained all that has happened and finds out everyone is really upset with this unnamed assistant manager. Now, because of me, everyone is complaining about him to upper management. I guess I got the ball rolling. Or the shout that created the landslide.

I have had 3 personal incidents that were out of line, and I only deal with him once a week, if even that often. I was shocked to learn that his work ethic is a poor as his people skills, and he has people upset with him pretty much everyday he works.

Now that I think of it, every problem I've had at that store revolved around him, except the hours, and now that he's run off half the warehouse staff I could get full time if I wanted it.....I don't. Actually, it's not so bad. The work is not that hard and it is kinda fun working with all the different people joking and having a little fun. We trade quips all night and before you know it, the night is over.

My afterschool program pay going to get in late this month, but they say it will be in by Wed, so I'm good. I would have paniced if they made me wait until December.My tutoring money is the light at the end of the tunnel.

I have complied a list of parts I can put on the truck to see if it can be repaired by an emssions component replacement. I hope to be putting things like creature comforts in it instead of running parts.

Tonight is Halloween. I'm going to try to make it to Franklin St tonight and take pictures and see the sights. I've had a bad time with Haloween the past few years and I wasn't looking forward to it. October 18th was the 17th anniversary of my Grandmother's death. I never did care much for Easter or Christmas after that. She was the person that seemed to make the holidays "magical". That magical part died with her. I've tried with little success to re-kindle my love of Halloween wih little effect. I guess too many things have happened along the way.

I met up with Debbie and her family this Saturday. It was great to see those guys after all these years. We talked, but the conversation was all over the place, mostly education. BTW Nate, she was FLOORED to hear you are a teacher. She invited me to her next outing, and I'll be there if at all possible.

I've noticed I try really hard to be an optimist, but my life has been a little too harsh for that. It's like I built a wall around myself for years and shut everyone out. Then I decide to look outside too see that I wasn't missing anything but drama and greif and wonder what the fuss is all about.

I noticed a few things by hanging out with Debbie Saturday.
1. There's always plenty to talk about and do, no wonder I always liked being around her so much.
2. I'm not the same person I was all those years ago.
3. Compared to Deb and Jason, I've aged badly. I don't think I look as young as they do. She hasn't seemed to age a bit.

I get into my school stories when I tell them, and she was genuinely freaked by my "crazy eyes" stare. I've noticed most teachers have the "you have screwed up" look that they try to use to keep kids inline before any real discipline happens. Punishment takes effort, or so I've learned. So when the teacher seems to show no mercy in the punishent they doled out, it's because you made them waste their own time on you for something other than what they are paid for. I digress.

Every teacher has thier own "serious stare". It ususally compliments the style they have. All the great teachers I remember have vicious stares that are the stuff of nightmares. Some teachers have the quiet deadpan stare. Debbie did hers for me, and I admit it would have made me wither inside. She has the cold, evil stare down. Ms B (one of my HS english teachers)had the sadistic matriarch slide into medusa stare that scared the Hell out of me on my first day of school. Ms Faucette, my boss, has bright eyes and a warm smile, I think she is a cool person. But her stare looks like her enitre face frowns. I'll know what "you're fired" looks like. I'd love to get some choice ones and post them. Maybe a the book on the topic, with interviews and the psychology behind it.........hmmmmm.

I'd like to do a book on assertive discipline in schools. Even in the few years I've been doing it, I've learned quite a bit about what works, what doesn't, and what is tools and techniques are crucial to achieve optimal results. I'd love to create a book with an effective program. Maybe do public speaking tours during my Summers. that would be awesome. The Wilson Discipline Approach seminar, teaches you skills and shows you rescources to keep you school under control. Sign up today!

not much today

I haven't had too much going on this week. I've been plenty busy, but nothing new and exciting. I need either a way to shave down my living expenses, or do way better than Best Buy. I want to get on with the summer cleaning crew next year, and that would be a fine summer suplament to my pay. If I could save up my cash with the extra from the after school program, I won't have to do anything. I don't know, I kind of like the idea of tooling around the house all Summer, making repairs, doing projects, and grilling out. Sounds like fun to me.

Nathan made an comment about lottery odds. I've also heard all these disparaging comments for years. Yes, I know it's 146 million to one odds. Yes, I know I have a better chance of getting struck by lightning. I enjoy it. I like playing the lottery. There is no lottery in NC, yet. We take a road trip to Virginia once a month. I buy lottery tickets and scratch-off cards. We have dinner and talk about all the wonderful stuff we'll do when we're rich. Some of it is just fantasy, but I don't plan my success or my future on the lottery. I'm in a career, I have a five year plan, and I'll be successful with or without it. I love how some people say it's an unfair tax on the poor. The successful people of the world cannot have any concept of the need for hope in a poor man's life. When you give up hope, you start dying inside. Besides, the flaw in the lightning argument is there are more lighning strikes than lottery drawings each year. If lightning only struck twice a week in one random spot in the world, the odds of would be even. Also, how many lottery winners have been struck by lighning I wonder?

The truck is in total disarray. There are things not hooked up that should be. I'm not too sure I can do too much without a good reference point. I'm getting mad enough to put a 302 V8 in it and be done with it. I'll wait until next month to see what I come up with when I actuallt have money to do it.

Time to die

I just deleted my political blog because I'm not too terribly concerned with keeping it up right now. I take intrest in politics and world events, but not enough to elaborate on it daily. RIP wilsonpolitics.blogspot.com.

Weekend wasteland

Didn't do much. I helped Robyn put together her kid's bedroom furniture. It's the cheap Sauder stuff, but I liked it, new matresses too. I'm so jealous.

Putting the furniture together is the tedious part. It takes about 8 hours of consistent effort to put two of those kits together. And if someone is staning over your shoulder asking questions is nerve-shattering. No, niether Robyn nor her mother critcized my assembly of the pressboard monstrosities, but I can only imagine that most domestic abuse cases start with a Suader furniture kit. Imagine a trailer somewhere. The patriarch of the family, a marginally educated man,trying to decipher the instructions through a haze of cigarette smoke, a beer buzz, kids screaming, tv blasting, and wife critiqueing every move.

He starts swearing at all of them because it's obvious only to him that he can't focus due to the nagging, and screaming, and the tv. He can't even hear himself think, let alone figure out the cryptic instructions that seem to be in every language but English. Now his kids are crying, his wife is now screaming at him for talking to his family like that, he is slipping into a psychotic rage even now. He goes to leave, he needs to calm down, she wants to fight. She says a few cutting remarks blocking his path out. He pushes her out of the way and makes a few choice comments in retort. She picks up the the first breakable thing she can grab and hurls it with all her might towards his head. It shatters and and rends delicate flesh., sending warm blood flowing. She pushes him from the door and threatens him. His instincts have gone from flight to fight and stands up to beat her within an inch of her life. Next he beat beats all of his kids and sends them running. This is about the time the sheriff shows up and sees a drunken rage.

He's hauled off in a police cruiser, she's in the back of an ambulance. A social worker is with the kids trying to find relatives to take them in and two detectives are taking pictures and sorting out the the clutter: a shattered porcilin unicorn, shredded cardboard, empty beercans, spilled ashtays, and a half assembled Sauder entertainment center, just out of layaway this morning. Damn you Sauder, damn you.

I made a few diagnostic test to my ranger. Compression seems to be strong. I took off some of the sensors that could be cleaned and soaked them in solvent. I'll reattach them in the next few days to see if it makes a difference. If not, I'll replace the uncleanable sensors and see what we have from there. I still feel good about the potental of the truck, it just needs tlc.

As of yesterday, I'm so sick of Best Buy, I can't stand it. I have something I want to do and I can't, I ask a week in advance to help me out, but they refuse, in a threatening manner no less. I think it's the department I'm in. I'll see about transferring to another one and perhaps I'll enjoy it more. I'll probably quit either way.

Man, I gots to hit that lottery.

Coasting on fumes

I'm broke. It's a bad feeling when you work as much as I do and have nothing to show for it. I had to miss the Guilford College open house due to an assembly for the afterschool program I do as my part-time job. We were there until after 7, it was hot and fairly boring, but there were a few highlights. The Carolina Panthers Topcat cheerleaders were there, at least for of them. I'm pretty sure very attractive women, in skin-tigh clothing, gyrating to music is a great way to get the attention of middle school boys, I'm not too sure it's all that appropriate. They were well behaved, but if there's not too much thought on misbehavior when you're in a sweltering hot gym being bored to tears.

I got my truck home on Tuesday, I've been reading up on what all might be wrong. It seems to be somewhere in the sensors malfunctioning. I'll clean the ones I can, replace the ones I can't one by-one untill we get her smoothed out. I'm actually more confident in the project now than I was before. I think it just needs a good cleaning out, the computer reset, and driven a few days so it can figure out what's going on for itself. Computerized cars can find their equillibrium but boy, all those sensors are a real pain.

I have had a surprise blast from the past, Debbie Woodruff has gotten back in touch with me. I find it funny how my life seems to be running in a big circle these days. I keep in touch with my high school freinds, Paul & Nate, more than just about anyone else. Debbie was a very dear friend in High School. Honestly, she's one of the few people I would trust in school. She was the smartest person I think I knew. I really don't think I can find one bad thing to say about Debbie. She's invited me to get together and catch up. She's married, has a beautiful daughter, and a very stable career. Out of all my friends, I knew she'd do the best. I've done horrible. I'm almost embarrased to catch up with old friends. I've made a series of poor choices that has led up to this comedey of errors I call life.

I was talking to an 8th grade teacher, she said that intellectual people never get anywhere in life because they are too atune to the details and never take caution to the wind. Interesting perspective. I agree totally, but I'd never heard it put that way before. Dumber people who are successful are successful because they have a one-track mind. Like a predator, they lunge at a goal and never mind the details and usually succeed just from sheer tenacity and concentrated effort. I know a fellow like that. he owns about 15 Domino's Pizza stores. Rich man,not terribly bright, but he told me something similiar. "The secret to success is hard work, a little luck and sticking with what you know. I don't know s--t except for pizza, so here I am. Figure out what you know well and put all your effort there. You'll make money."

That might be over-simplistic, but then again, maybe complicating things is half my problem.

What a day, Tuesday.....

I called out of work to attend an enrollment seminar at Guilford College. It was too full to attend, so I re-scheduled for Thursday evening but got all my transcripts and finacial information together, so it was not in vain.

Got the final missing part for my truck and it still won't work right. It's now time to do this myself. The person my parents insisted I take it to wanted the truck, now I think he's just trying to either make me not want it, or trying to squeeze me for money. Either way, if I were to give up on it, I'd sell it on ebay and certainly not to him.

Robyn took me to the State Fair. I sure was excited. We ate at the restraunt she works at, Ted's. It was wonderful as usual.

The State Fair ususally means a few things to me. Deep fried junk food. Pretzels, funnel cakes, fries twinkies.......I ate a fried twinkie. It tasted like congestive heart failure, which means pretty darn tasty. The next thing the fair is all about is the rides I tend not to go on, since we were broke, I opted out of the rides. The last would be the animals, tiny horses, and giant rabbits all out where you can pet them.

This year Robyn wanted to see Kenny Rogers, she liked him as child and wanted to see him before he dies. I got the seats last month, they were nosebleeder tickets. I looked out the window and I saw my house, which is an hour's drive away. Kenny was in good form, I'm not really a fan but he sounded very good and I enjoyed myself. Robyn didn't do as well. Robyn's dad died of cancer in 1994 and he was the spitting image of Kenny Rogers. I saw an aged performer who has seemingly gotten better over ther years at working a crowd. She saw her father, and although she enjoyed the show, it was very emotional for her. I can imagine. My grandmother's favorite performer was KR. There are alot of his records in her collection. When Christmas time came round, she listen to old records and his were always in the mix.

We got lost after the show and didn't get our bearings untill after the fair was closing for the night I didn't get to see any man-eating bunnies, but it was still fun.

I'll be arranging to take my truck home tonight. I'll work on it at home in my spare time. more to come......

blue......

I think the winter blues are starting to come early. Not that I'm totally depressed, I just feel a little blue, a little muted, a tad sedate.

I have a major hurdle in my goals ahead of me soon. Getting back into school and getting it financed. If I can't, I don't know what to do next. I'm not stressed either. I'm in a "I guess we'll just see" mood.

I found out today unexpectedly one of my dogs was pregnant. If they are healthy puppies, my property tax problems are solved this year. It was nasty too. I was grooming them one last time before winter, and my sister insisted we do this dog first. I picked her up and noticed she was like a tick ready to pop. She had milky tets and a loose mucus plug, that means any day now. And it means I was too grossed out to eat lunch.

Paul made me a whole DVD full of goodies, can't wait to see it. I talked to him for awhile, I was supposed to go his shop, but I was too worn out for such shenanigans after everything else.

I had to go to the holiday pep rally at Best Buy. We were talking about teamwork and poicy and all other types of nonesesnse. I cracked a few hateful jokes that the employees loved and the manager I was talking about didn't. I guess I'll be working one hour a week now. I actually had another employee come up and say "how you gonna say that? You're crazy!"
No, I'm not crazy, I don't care anymore. There is a certain liberty to be found in not caring. If you have a good work ethic, it can make you an incredible employee. it can also make you leave at the first slighted comment. I'm somewhere in the middle.

I made a joke once about I hope they raise the bar because I'm a limbo kind of guy. Sometimes I wonder.......

I'm taking all day Tuesday off to apply to Guilford College. Perhaps I might get some questions answered. The main question is: how the heck am I going to pay for it all? Then, how am I going to drive to G'borro 2 times a week? My car is a piece of doo-doo.

Doo-doo is a hilarious word to me.

Honing my craft

I do believe I'm getting better at my job. I can go for days without having any real problems. The students, even thought they change from day to day, seem to almost instinctivly know what I expect from them and make effort to not incur my wrath. I guess I have become the sadistic nightmare everyone dreads. I get a little choked up at the thought, Granny would be so proud of me.

Today has been a pleasant day outside. That mechanic should have finished my truck by now, even if he did, my money is running out for the month and I may not be able to pay him at this point until my next payday. I guess he'll just have to wait.

I was thinking about the teacher shortage. The way to solve our teacher problem is to pay them more. If teachers had a competitive salary for the type of work they did, then there would be a teacher surplus and then schools could cherry pick from the very best, not scrape the bottom of the barrel. And let me tell you, there are some dingleberries that teach.

I guess America's biggest problem is that it demands quality on the cheap. You can't always get it like that.

Changing life.

I've had quite a few very goof reiends in my life that we all met either at work or at school. Then we part ways. I find it hard sometimes to relate how we once did. Pizza people don't get "teacher problems" just as jerks that don't tip are starting to fade away from my "I hope you burn in Hell" list.